One of the most vital emotions that truly make the world go round is love… I have always wondered what exactly is it about love that makes everyone(without exception) undergo a transformation. The answer was not simple.. but had to be found. There are a few things however that need to be clarified a) only sensitive but brave souls can venture in the domain of love b) they will get hurt,depressed,obsessed,freaked out but eventually it will all make sense c) is it worth it?
Now, the reason we go crazy loving and being loved is that for the first time in our lives we experience selflessness…. which in itself is a wonderful emotion. When a person is in love he or she unknowingly gives himself or herself completely to his or her lover.Whether it is about starting to change your looks,giving up a few commitments for a loved one, adjusting to that new person,knowing that she is the one worth giving it all up for- this feeling of ego-lessness that you share with your girlfriend/boyfriend, spouse is essentially what brings you happiness and misery yes, initially we are fine with our unselfish selves but then our conditioning takes over, even in relationships, it is at this time that love silently exits from our life and what enters is misery,possessiveness,betrayal and depression. The beauty of the jewel called love is in giving it away freely, without our customary miserliness, you can’t love in percentages or wait for a return of the favour. Our egos are so inflated that we cannot even love our loved one wholeheartedly.. after a few months into a relationship we selfish people start questioning ourselves- Why am I being so devoted? I CHANGED MY LIFE PLAN FOR HIM/HER TO FIT IN, WHAT IS HE/SHE DOING IN RETURN?That my friend is a stupid question, the moment you place yourself in a superior position that your lover you are in for trouble..the demon has returned and now try how much you may the mirage of a beautiful love lies shattered and yes, you may keep changing your lovers like clothes but you will still be left pining for that magic that is present in a relationship’s first few months. The situation becomes even more difficult when you have to HAPPILY sacrifice your interests in order that your relationship work and that is a tough call, this is the reason why husbands and wives quarrel. Each one has sacrificed his or her interests for the betterment of their marriage but the sacrifice needs to be complete you can not save yourself in love, no you can’t,your ego will be tossed and turned like a rag doll in a hurricane but you have to not give up on love. Wives are famous for taunting,nagging etc – that is so because in India a woman sacrifices,adjusts and her ego takes a toss lot more often than her husband’s but her love is not yet complete, her little self tries to preserve itself when she thinks how much she has sacrificed for their marriage to work.. the demon fights back and who is to bear it?The henpecked husband and vice versa so, we have a quintessential couple, always fighting always longing but not ready to take the complete plunge.So, if you are in love dissolve yourself completely don’t try and save yourself,love like you have never loved anyone,don’t expect anything..the reward is the happiness you get in giving, each time your ego is dealt a blow accept it and love.Easier said than done, but the bitter medicine once gulped will do the trick.You will experience the love that you have longed for,till then,keep practicing giving love, soon you shall receive it in unmeasurable hugs and kisses.
“You never lose by loving, you always lose by holding back”